


Waste It On Me

by donnarafiki



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Based on a BTS song, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Get Together, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, tiny tiny mention of a blowjob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-27
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-08-08 11:46:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16428782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donnarafiki/pseuds/donnarafiki
Summary: “Want me to list all the reasons?” Draco asked as he held a hand up to count. “One, you hate me. Two, when we’re together you either pick a fight or give me the silent treatment. Three, you’re disgusted by media attention which is exactly what you’ll get with this stupid idea and four, like I said, I suck at all and every possible form of relationships. I even chased Pansy away, and that’s basically the definition of impossible.”Harry blinked at him, slowly, several times, before he spoke. And when he did, his voice was filled with something close to childlike wonder. “You never said you didn’t like me.”





	Waste It On Me

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is based on
> 
>  
> 
> [this song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WP7duqy60h8)
> 
>  
> 
> by Steve Aoki and BTS
> 
> Disclaimer: This is a fan work, I do not own any of these characters, lyrics or names

> It's just you and me now
> 
> I don't know your secrets
> 
> But I'll pick up the pieces
> 
> Pull you close to me now
> 
> \- BTS, Waste It On Me

“I honestly don’t know why I still come to these things.” Draco sighed and knocked down his drink. “You always persuade me to go to singles night and I always end up miserable and drunk.”

“I remember you having plenty of fun last time, and many more times before that.” Pansy wiggled her eyebrows, but the memory of being caught receiving a sloppy blow job didn’t even embarrass him. It just made him feel worse. Pansy rolled her eyes at him. “Oh come on Draco, stop your sulking. Plenty of people would kill for your looks and your shags and you know it. Enjoy it while it lasts, darling.”

“You’ve been saying that for years, but still nothing has changed. I can still easily pull any bloke I fancy, but as soon as I start to love them, which you know I always do, they run away. Every single time.” He grabbed a beer coaster and efficiently started tearing it to pieces.

“Do you know how depressing it is that my longest relationship lasted five weeks? I’m thirty-five, easily fit enough to get asked out by fucking swimwear models in their twenties yet I can never make anything last. Apparently my personality is so off-putting no one ever wants a two month anniversary with me.” Pansy opened her mouth in protest but closed it again when she realised she had nothing to say. Not even a drunk Pansy could try to argue with the truth.

“So yeah maybe I won’t end up drunk and miserable tonight, but I’ll end up drunk and miserable in two or three weeks and it sucks. And then I’ll go to singles night with you again to make me forget about how unlovable I am for a moment and the circle just starts all over again. Love is a fucking waste of my time. I don’t know why I still bother.”

“Really? Pulling the unlovable card?” Pansy shot him an unimpressed look. “First of all that’s a lie, because I love you for a start. Second, you only ever date muggles. Do you really think that will turn into a proper relationship even though they understand nothing of the baggage you carry or the scars you have? If you’re looking for more than just a pull then you shouldn’t be going to a singles night like this.”

“You and I both know no sane wizard would date me. And if you’re looking to stay friends with me then stop throwing cold hard reasoning in my face when I’m feeling shit.” Draco shot a glare at Pansy and carefully shifted away from her, further into the corner of their booth. “Hogwarts is a million years behind us, it’s not illegal to drop the stone cold Slytherin bitch attitude once in a while and give someone a hug.”

“Whatever.” Pansy got to her feet. “If you’re giving me that tone I’m leaving. Bye.”

She was gone before Draco had the chance to say anything back. _Fuck_. Not that he wanted to wallow in self-pity but he had just proven his point quite dramatically. And now he was alone, in a pub nowhere near his own flat with a solid three hours left before he’d be sober enough to apparate.

He was almost tempted to go home with the first okay looking dude he met just to have something to do, but after a bit of self-reflexion he decided against it. If things had gotten so bad that he started pushing his closest friends away, something had to change. No more loveless half arsed relationships for Draco. From now on it would be just him, his friends once he figured out how to win Pansy back, and a book to keep him company as he hid away in his booth waiting for the alcohol to leave his system.

A singles night indeed.

* * *

 “I cannot imagine being able to read in a nightclub, left alone getting sucked into the story like that.” Draco tore his eyes away from the page, feeling slightly disoriented. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been reading, but it was more than three hours alright. It even took a while for the bloke beside him to come into view, and when he did…

“Potter?” Before he could think about what he was doing, he reached out and poked Harry in the face. Only lightly, but still. Though it did prove to him that Harry was real, and also very much actually Harry because he knew every detail of that confused look after their many shared potions classes. “Why are you here?”

“Avoiding the press,” Harry replied. It seemed they both agreed on ignoring his weird face poking action, for which Draco was very glad. “They always haunt me for weeks after break-ups.”

That made no sense to Draco, possibly because he still hadn’t lost his book daze despite the shock of having Harry Potter sitting half a foot away from him. The man looked dashing as fuck, which was probably why Draco couldn’t act like a normal fucking human being anymore all of the sudden. “Why would people break up with you?”

“Ha!” Harry threw his head back and laughed. “I have a list of like ten people who can answer that question for you. And if they say anything reasonable please tell me because I can’t figure it out for the life of me.”

“Maybe they don’t have good reasons.” Draco put his book down and stared at the cover instead of at Harry. Maybe he’d be better at thinking his words through if he wasn’t looking at the specky git. “Love is messed up. It doesn’t always work the way we imagine. Giving out love no one wants to have is just a waste of time.” Draco let out a humourless chuckle. “And the longer you try to fight a losing battle the more damage it will do.”

They both knew he wasn’t just talking about love now.

“That’s a depressing way to think about yourself,” Harry said after what felt like a century worth of silence. “And it’s not true.”

“You don’t know shit about me, Potter. You can’t say that.” He finally looked up at Harry again and saw an annoying amount of determination on his face. As if the man was now planning to find out every single detail about his life just to prove him wrong. “People spit in my face when I walk through Diagon Alley and they flee when they see the third date approach. I know myself well enough to know when I’m wasting my time.” And despite what he’d told Pansy before he added, “Slytherins are efficient like that.”

“If you really think love is nothing more than just a waste of your time, waste it on me.” Draco’s mouth fell open as he gaped at Harry. Harry, who had looked tipsy before but now seemed stone cold sober and dead serious. “I mean why not? We found each other tonight, and I’d like to think that means something.”

“Why not? Potter, why not?” Draco could not believe how naive Harry was. It had taken the two of them a full year before they managed to sit on the same couch without arguing, and even then they’d sat in awkward silence. If there had been such a category Draco was sure they would have been voted _most unrealistic couple_ in their Hogwarts eighth year yearbook.

“Want me to list all the reasons?” Draco asked as he held a hand up to count. “One, you hate me. Two, when we’re together you either pick a fight or give me the silent treatment. Three, you’re disgusted by media attention which is exactly what you’ll get with this stupid idea and four, like I said, I suck at all and every possible form of relationships. I even chased Pansy away, and that’s basically the definition of impossible.”

Harry blinked at him, slowly, several times, before he spoke. And when he did, his voice was filled with something close to childlike wonder. “You never said you didn’t like me.”

“Well I-, I-,” _Fuck_ , why hadn’t he added that white lie to his list? Why did he always have to sabotage himself? And why the _fuck_ did Harry look so cute when he was hopeful? It wasn’t fair. But at least it was a good excuse for his answer. No one could say they disliked Harry when he looked at them like that. “I might have omitted to mention that because it’s not on the list, but that doesn’t make any of my other points any less valid.”

“I don’t think it’s fair that you’re not drunk.” Harry muttered more to himself than to Draco. And then he continued to speak out loud. “You’re wrong again. I do not hate you. I enjoy fighting with you. I was awkward because you are gorgeous and I was an eighteen-year-old awkward bisexual fuck without any social skills. I hate the media but I’ll be damned if I ever let them stop me from doing what I want, and I refuse to believe you suck at relationships until I find out first-hand. Now your list is empty and you still don’t dislike me.” Harry sat back looking triumphant for a second, before looking confused again. “And that was supposed to prove my point, but I forgot what my point was.”

“You’re drunk, Potter.” Draco rolled his eyes, trying to look like he didn’t care at all. He hated the effect Harry’s words had on him. Hated how not being hated by the specky git made him feel special, because it was embarrassing that he needed that kind of validation. That the idea of being loved was so strange to him that being told he wasn’t hated filled his stomach with butterflies. “You should go home.”

“No.” Harry scooted closer to him, allowing Draco a sniff of his sweat mixed with cheap coconut shampoo which shouldn’t turn him on like it did. “I am not going home until I have an answer. You say love is a waste of your time, that no one wants what you have to offer, but I don’t believe you. I think I want everything you have to offer. And if you’re willing to waste your love on me, then I could find out if I’m right and maybe your love won’t be a waste of time at all. So, will you?”

Draco tried to hide further in his corner, but he didn’t even attempt to tear his gaze away from Harry. He could never do that. “It’s a stupid idea Potter.” He sputtered, but he didn’t manage to keep the hope out of his voice. “It won’t work. It never does.”

“Well, maybe this time it will. We won’t know until we try.” Harry came closer, bridging the distance between them until he was almost sitting on Draco’s lap. “Please Draco.” Their lips almost brushed as he spoke. “Waste your love on me.”

Draco was going to hate himself later. In fact, he already hated himself right now. But none of that stopped him from saying, “Alright. I’ll waste my love on you.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> I very much hope I did the song justice and that you enjoyed reading this!
> 
> And the biggest thank you to my beta Chris<3
> 
> All the remaining mistakes are mine
> 
> (and pls consider leaving kudos or a comment if you liked it. they feed my writer's soul)


End file.
